Today I'm posting at chemo typing on the iPad. I'm prone to typos from time to time so I'll have to be extra vigilant today. It's never good to have autocorrect completely change the meaning of a sentence!


We just returned from family reunion at Pokagon state park in northern Indiana. I was again really attuned to what makes Cathy such a special person. She has an amazing ability to connect to people. Her focus and care in conversation shows people how important they are. I learn a lot about how to love by watching her speak with others. Doing what she does takes a particular discipline that comes naturally to her. It is something I want to be able to improve in my own interactions. For Cathy is easy and natural, making others feel at ease, natural, and comfortable. She is really gifted in this way. It is probably one of the things that so attracted me to her 20 years ago. She is the perfect person to help uncomfortable people feel comfortable. I'm so thankful she cut through my awkwardness with her loving words. 


While we were at Pokagon Cathy met another breast cancer patient. Cathy passed her in the hall at the lodge one afternoon and complimented her on her nice beanie. The other patient laughed it off and returned the greeting. The next morning at breakfast they got a chance to talk. This woman shared with Cathy that she cries every day and is constantly thinking that she's going to die. Like Cathy, she is a new mother, with a one year old baby. She noticed a lump while nursing and waited four months to go to the doctor thinking that it would go away when she stopped nursing. It didn't go away.  This 39 year old mother now has cancer spread to many lymph nodes. 


Since Cathy told me her story I've been haunted by how terrible that feeling must be. We don't know about lymph nodes or staging with Cathy so it's hard to know her prognosis at this point. We do take solace in knowing that we acted as quickly as possible. Cathy waited four days to go in - and that was only because it was over memorial day weekend. Those four days were agonizing for us.  I can't imagine this woman's emotions.  Cathy's new friend waited four months and now faces a dire prognosis with a very difficult road ahead. What would the prognosis have been if she went in when she first noticed the lump? What if more women, more men, had abnormalities investigated when first noticed? What makes people wait?  I know that for some it is the cost of healthcare. For others it is surely fear of doctors and procedures. But how much easier and less invasive would the procedures be if addressed earlier?


I wouldn't go as far as to overstate like a billboard we saw on the way to Pokagon.  "Prevent cancer, have a colonoscopy" it read.  Maybe instead it should have said "Detect cancer early with a colonoscopy" or "Prevent cancer with a coffee aenema - check your work with a colonoscopy".  I don't mean to make light of it, but we owe it to ourselves and to our loved ones to pursue and follow up on things that aren't right with our bodies. For those who wait because of the financial magnitude of healthcare that is another discussion that is political, one which I am ill equipped to enter. However, we could save ourselves and our loved ones some pain by visiting the doctor when we have issues that might require attention or by simply have regular check ups. If you haven't been to the doctor since last August, click out of your browser and make an appointment. If something hasn't been right about your body recently, pick up the phone and call. Take care of yourselves. You are loved and valued.